Your Final Christmas Card.

Twas the day after Christmas, and out on the grass
The doggies were happy, and saying, “At last
The master is washing the last load of dishes
And scraping together my best Christmas wishes.
The leftover meatballs and prime rib smell yummy
And soon will be making their way to my tummy!
I spied one last biscuit – or was it a roll? –
No matter, as long as it lands in my bowl.
If I could get hold of that See’s Candy box it
Would be a delight! But, alas, it is toxic.
No matter; the pan drippings make for a stew
That slides down like buttah; I don’t even chew.
There’s a bite of a pickle, a smidgeon of peas.
Potatoes au gratin with cheese! Oh, the cheese!
And to finish it off, on the bottom there lies
A bit of whipped cream and a sliver of pie.
Yesterday’s kibble was nice, I must say
But nothing compares to the feast of today.”

Aren't you glad it's not your Christmas gift!

I have some friends at work who are my age, and we suffer from the same Oldish Lady Symptoms. We all wake up in the wee wee hours (my choice of words will indicate what it is which typically awakens us Oldish Ladies) and can't get back to sleep. So we compared notes on what was the dumbest thing we ever bought on HSN or QVC in the dead of night, when they put on the junk only sleep-deprived Oldish Ladies will buy. Friend Pam won: a Singing Bathroom Santa. Nice.

On a completely different note, I've been tracking a purchase I recently made. (Just for clarification, I was almost entirely awake, so it's not by any means an impulse purchase. I really really need this. In fact, I apparently need two of them. Never mind what it is.) Anyway, I check the USPS site daily to watch the progress of this item. I ordered it on December 14, on which day it shipped from Reno NV to my home in Southern California. Let's accompany my little purchase on it's Christmas journey, shall we?

Dec 15: 2:20 AM Pickup RENO, NV
Dec 16: 2:20 AM Sort Center Arrival SACRAMENTO, CA
Dec 17: 9:29 AM Sort Center Departure SACRAMENTO, CA
Dec 17: 3:58 PM Sort Center Arrival LOS ANGELES, CA
Dec 21: 8:07 AM Sort Center Departure NEW BERLIN, WI

Reno to Riverside via Wisconsin. That's governmental efficiency in practice. I'll let you know if it ever arrives. And if it's as marvelous in actual use as it is on tv, I might even tell you what it is. And what song he sings.

Yippee!

I won a blog contest! Yep! My fabulous prize: an itunes gift card. I'll be downloading some John Williams in anticipation of the new Indiana Jones movie. And some John Denver. And some Elton John. Since all my downloads are JOHN-themed I'm thinking of picking up one of these gadgets. I wonder if I can get one that comes with bright purple toilet paper...

You say it's Your birthday...

I'd celebrate The First Christmas like this...but I'd be spending New Year's Eve in traction.

Poly Pride in the Privy

Need a last minute gift for Dear Aunt Clemintine? Looking for a little something for your hard-to-shop-for boss? Baffled by the desire to buy something unusual for your neighbor who has absolutely everything? Ladies and gentlemen I present for your viewing and shopping enjoyment:


Black toilet paper. Also available in bright green and deep orange (Go, Bears) Now, let's not get into a discussion about the inherent problems attached to this item, like how, during the ascribed use of said product, do you know that you're no longer in need of it. It's Christmas, and I just wanted to provide you with a little shopping help.

My work here is done.

Christmas Table Ideas

I would set the table today and take a photo for blogging, but honestly, who wants to dust the Christmas dishes for a week? And who wants to eat off dishes that have required dusting? So maybe I'll take a picture on Christmas...

meanwhile, I have the most beautiful Christmas dishes ever, which I will use with red placemats & linen napkins. A votive candle at every place; a small wrapped present on each plate...maybe a little bag of nokos, (thanks, Payton!) And I have a little tumbling Santa set which has been part of our Christmases for 35 years. So I'll find a place for him.

Share Your Christmas Menus!

What're your Christmas Eve, Christmas morning, and Christmas day menus? I'm thinking...

Christmas Eve: Taco Station tamales with rice, beans and corn cakes, green salad; iced tea or coffee; lemon meringue pie

Christmas morning: one of those yummy make-it-the-night-before baked eggy cassseroles, Sin-a-Buns, fake Mimosas, hot apple cider, coco, coffee...I'm sure my kids will HAVE to make a *$ run!

Christmas dinner: raw veg plate; prime rib roast (so easy and good, and WOW the house smells A-mazing); au graten potatoes for my new son-in-law; broccoli salad in memory of my mo-in-law; grandson-generated fruit salad as posted earlier; yeasty rolls; a couple of Marie's best pies...including that beautiful cherry cream cheese beauty; iced tea, coffee, and sparkling cider.

Coming tomorrow... special table setting ideas. Get ready to share again.

My Early Christmas Gift

Our Christmas program was presented this weekend. It was a play about a couple of angels who are struggling to understand why God would give up heaven and be born as a human baby. Very fun and silly, with amazing music. And then there were the dancers...

Our dancers are always wonderful. Mariel Coe is a gifted choreographer. Becky, Cindy, Jennifer, Hanni -- all talented, graceful. And there was a child with them, a beautiful little girl with long, curly blond hair. I'd never seen her before. She began to dance around the manger, and I began to weep. It was as though my own little Baylee, gone almost five years, was dancing on that stage. And I was reminded of what Robbie, then three years old, said about his lost sister: "She's dancing with Jesus now".

Thank you, Lord, for a picture of my precious granddaughter, now with You, now dancing in celebration of Your Son. No Christmas gift will ever match it.

Ugh.

The former winner of the Most Disgusting Commercial Ever trophy, Carl's Jr, has been replace by D & G Watches. If you see the beginning of a TV ad with a lovely man and a lovely woman each frantically checking their (quite expensive) watches and trying to grab a cab, obviously in a great hurry to meet up with their respective dearly beloveds, DO NOT HESITATE. Turn the channel. Or hit the off button. Or throw a fruit cake through the screen. Trust me; you'll be happier not seeing the remainder of this commercial.

A Fail Safe Recipe from The UnCook

Here's an easy fruit salad recipe we used to make for Girl Scout camping trips. I'm going to have the boys make it for Christmas dinner.

1 can fruit cocktail, drained; reserve the liquid
1 box instant banana pudding mix
1 container Cool Whip, softened
1 pkg mini marshmellows
1 banana, cut into slices (and any other fruit you want to add; banana-cutting is kid friendly because you don't need a sharp knife)

Mix the banana pudding with the juice from the fruit cocktail. Blend in the Cool Whip. Stir everything else into the pudding, and mix it up well til everything gets nicely covered. Keep it in the fridge til dinner.

It's pretty in a glass bowl, especially if you add more cherries or red grapes.
I suppose you could also add coconut if you really felt you MUST.

Wha....?

Robbs and Cameron attend a wonderful school with dedicated teachers who spend countless hours trying to instill grammar, math, science and social studies into the minds of the children. They are supported by a hard-working PTO which generally does much good for the school with fund raising and various programs. This time of year, the PTO provides a little store where the children can purchase inexpensive gifts. It's in a classroom all decked out for shopping, with a big banner in the window that reads "KID'S KORNER HOLIDAY SHOPPE"

Really? The cutesy Londonesque allusion is one thing; maybe they want the children to embrace our Dickensonian roots. But what about the blatantly misspelled word? These poor kids are now doomed to listen to Korn while they dine at Kountry Kitchen and shop at Toys R Us.

Who thought this was a good idea?

And the winner is...

...me! Sarah and Bill are going to the hockey game, so I get both boyos tonight. In my house there will be one cutie patooty boy in jammies on each red couch, wrapped in their new fuzzy Christmas blankets, watching Santa Claus is Coming to Town. I am a happy Grammie.

Seven months and counting...

Thanks, Kimberly. This is hilarious!

Here are the winning entries to the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
__________

The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words. And the winners are:

1. coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.

2. flabbergasted, adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. abdicate, v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. esplanade, v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. willy-nilly, adj. impotent.

6. negligent, adj. absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.

7. lymph, v. to walk with a lisp.

8. gargoyle, n. olive-flavoured mouthwash.

9. flatulence, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.

10. balderdash, n. a rapidly receding hairline.

11. testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.

12. rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing
adopted by proctologists.

13. pokemon, n. a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation
with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death,
the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer
shorts worn by Jewish men

Enchanting Enchanted

A lovely, silly PG-rated film. I went with Bethany, and we laughed out loud. A lot. Then we stayed for the very last of the credits to see who did the music...and walked out singing a few of the songs by Alan Menkin (Little Mermaid, Beauty & the Beast, Aladdin) and Stephen Schwartz (Prince of Egypt, Pocahontas, Godspell, Wicked). A few days later I took my grandkids, and even the 5-year-olds were enthralled. So were Sarah and Bill. The adults especially got a kick out of the hidden Disney allusions throughout the movie...not to mention Wicked, Rent, and Hairspray, the stars of which were in the film. I'm actually surprised there wasn't a poster for Grey's Anatomy plastered on the side of a bus!

Now, I must say there was another rodent (a chipmonk this time) in another restaurant, so I did have a brief "Bleh" moment. Apparently the fine people at Disney approve of, perhaps even encourage, vermin in their kitchens, so I guess I'll just have to let it go.

But you won't see me in line for the Blue Bayou.

Enjoy this little game...

This will boggle your mind and you will keep trying over and over again to see if you can outsmart your foot, but you can't.

1. While sitting where you are at your desk in front of your computer, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles.

2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction.

I told you so! And there's nothing you can do about it! You and I both know how stupid it is, but before the day is done you are going to try it again, if you've not already done so.

Thanksgiving Prayer Answered

Thank You, Jesus, for Little Peanut's "all clear" report

Eat More Pie

Happy Thanksgiving from the crew at Marie's!

A Different Kind of Green

Trav got his apron. Now Patti has her apron. Can Dan be far behind?

Before she started teaching, Daughter Number Two did the *bux thing. We had fun with that. Come on; play along:

To all the world, she was Krista the Barista. To Sarah and Bethany she was Sista Krista the Barista. Had she worked at a Bux in south San Diego county, she'd be Sista Krista the Chula Vista Barista. Now she's married. That would make Ryan Sista Krista the Chula Vista Barista's Mista.

I'm sure you get the gista. I really can't resista chance to share my lista the names of our own personal barista.

OK. I'm done.

Can you solve this problem?

1 lo-flow toilet
+ 2 little boys with busy alimentary tracts
+ 3 or more squares of t.p.
= ...um... I'll spare you the details

I know we're supposed to be all green and ecological-y, but honestly, can't I have an environment-friendly toilet that can handle a 5-year-old's itty-bitty creation without flooding the entire bathroom? I'd be willing to buy a new one. Any suggestions?

By the way, apparently, I am the only one in this family who has a good working relationship with the lowly plunger.

Ronco Bible

I've probably told you about my invention, the Ronco Bible. It comes with Wite-Out and a Sharpee, so you can eliminate the parts that pinch a bit, as well as add scriptures you might like to see. For example, you could erase the entire book of James, because, come on...ouch, right? Or if there's a section you really really like, you could put it in a few extra times, like setting your Ipod on repeat so you can listen to JT bringing sexy back over and over and over. And you might want to add a few promises to your Ronco Bible. Like, "And lo, ye shall come forth from thy multi-million ducet dwelling, and ye shall rideth in thy Mercedes from wence thy tunes floweth forth from thy Bose sound system". You can just see how really handy such a versatile Bible would be. Of course, we couldn't call it the Word of God. Maybe the Word of Larry.

Turns out, we just purchased a Bible which was apparently designed by the good folks at Ronco. If you look carefully at the photo, you'll notice that I John is just moving right along when all of a sudden --BAM!-- there's Luke again, popping in to say hello. So once again, my invention has already been invented. On the other hand, this is the very Bible C-Monkey carried in the wedding this summer. . . could be he dropped it once too often, stood on it a few times too many, kicked it down the stairs overly much, and the pages just shifted around a bit. Now we have a Bible with 87 books. Kewl!

Done and done!

The pie sale is over for another 4 months. Of course, Thanksgiving is just around the corner (it feels early this year...check your calendars and start getting ready), so there are lots more pies to sell, but the count for the October 2007 Fall Pie Sale for just the Redlands location was...


...20,000!


By the way, if you've never enjoyed a slice of this little gem (double cream blueberry), you are in for a taste treat of uber-deliciousness. Just a word to the wise.

Double-Dogging It

Our granddog, Chloe, is staying with us while her family has some work done in their yard. She is a sweet tempered blonde thing, and a pleasure to have around. Her fur is so soft, and she smiles all the time. She and Cali get along very well. So we have dogs squared, which, of course, means dog hair squared, dog food squared, (which leads directly to dog poop squared), refilling of water bowls squared, petting/scratching/belly rubbing squared. And they can do some serious snoring...squared.

They are both companion dogs, so they want to BE with me every second. We spend our days like this: wake up and greet me like I've been gone for a year--go out and pee--come back inside and greet me like I'm just back from my trip to the moon--do the dog food dance on the wooden floor with their doggie tap shoes (noisy!)--attempt to kiss me as I bend down to dump the dog food into the bowl--eat the entire bowl of food in the time it takes me to straighten back up--dance some more just in case I'm holding out on them--go outside to poo--come back inside and greet me like I'm their long lost best friend recently returned from safari--follow me from room to room THIS CLOSELY just in case I need an 80 pound dog wearing doggie tap shoes to step on my bare foot--lay down in whatever room I've decided upon--nap--wake up if I so much as wiggle a toe--greet me with profound enthusiasm--nap--follow me to another part of the house--nap--greet--repeat as needed for 12 hours. You get the idea.


Cali has no trouble with our wooden floors; she's a Lab, and has big o' fat webbed feet, which enable her to walk or run easily on the slick surface. Chloe, however, can't handle the floors. She has no traction at all, and the slippidy-slidy manuever does not please her. She gives me the look that says, "I'm an old, old lady with fragile hips. Surely you don't expect me to walk on this slippery floor. Surely you intend to take care of my personal needs by rearranging the entirety of your living habits to accomodate my various requirements." So all the throw rugs and bath mats from the various throw-ruggy areas of the house are laid out end to end to enable her to get from one room to another. It's a very attractive look...one I'm certain Vern Yip will want to steal, and use in his future interior designs.

She refuses to use the doggie door, because when I was trying to teach her how to work it, the flap snapped her on the nose just a tiny bit. That's all it took. She'll never even attempt it again. So that means whenever she has to go out (which is often; as I mentioned, she's old, and has a teeny little bladder), I have to GET UP and go let her out, then GET UP to go let her back in, followed by another excited greet session. Geesh.


Chloe is like any house guest. You enjoy their company, and you're really glad to see them. But soon the novelty wears off, and it's nice when they go home, and you can put the throw rugs back where they belong.

Rhett & Link

What a terrible name for a musical...

I was a kind of scared to go see it, but I'm awfully glad I did. A little bit of West Side Story, a little bit of Les Mis, and a whole lot of just plain fun.

16,154 (with 6 days left...)

What's a Bebo?

Yes, Bebo; your name is dumb, but your music -- ah, your music!

Alien Landscape

The sky is orange today, and creepy. The smoke could be coming from nearly any direction. Mr Roboto called me to say he could see Mars. It was the sun, but shining through the orange smoke, it looks like a strange red planet. So many friends and relatives of friends are losing their mountain homes. I'm sick for them. We sold our little cabin years ago, but every time there's a fire in the mountains, I worry for my neighbors.

Say a prayer for the fire fighters RIGHT NOW.

Nitty Gritty Dirt House

I left my windows open yesterday. I left my windows open, and we experienced Santa Anas. I left my windows open, and the entire City of Santa Ana blew into my house and deposited a landfill on every available surface. I left my windows open, and my home was conquored by a Mexican General and his army of sand, dirt, and soil. I left my windows open, and now C-Monkey can practice his letters without benefit of paper or pencil. I left my windows open, and now I am responsible for the deaths of several large ostriches, needed to create the many, many feather dusters I am going to need. I left my windows open, and now I'll be adding to the global warming crisis by running my vacuum for long periods of time as I de-dirt my home.

I left my windows open.

13,256 and counting...

Grin Day

We just celebrated Green Day in Blogville; I propose Grin Day, wherein we post some of the cute stuff our kids and subkids say.

For example, C-Monkey, who at 5 years old has no discernable understanding of weights, measures, clocks or calendars says, "Grammie, I love you fifteen minutes."

And that's enough for me!



pie count as of close of business Tuesday: 11,965
clbd: laying in the sunshine, staring out the window. (life is full)

Fall Pie Sale Stats.

Current count: 10,548 pies sold, with two weeks left










clbd: snoring under my chair

Raise your hand if you remember...

...the Riverside Plaza before it became all cosmopolitany.

The end is near...

I'm on #7 of 8 CDs in the book I'm currently "reading". I really like the main character, Nelly Cartwright. She's a spunky young woman who finds herself working for Buffalo Bill Cody. She has also known Wild Bill Hickok and Annie Oakley and the Earp Brothers and George Custer. She's smart and sassy, and funny; someone I'm glad to know.

But now the book is nearly over.

I hate this. I get so attached to the people in books, or movies or tv shows, but they always -- always -- leave me! Mary and Rhoda left me. Rory and Loreli left me. Even Harry left me, although he still has a couple of movies in him. I can completely understand how people get hooked on soap operas. Those characters never ever leave. Sure, they sometimes get into terrible yet unusual accidents that leave them in a coma, completely wrapped in bandages, with a series of facial burns which will require extensive plastic surgery, leaving them scarless (those daytime doctors are really good, aren't they?) and looking strangely different. Sometimes, oddly, their eyes have changed color and they are several inches taller. But the point is, they are still there. When I was in college I was hooked on a couple of soaps, but I asked God to heal me of them, and He did. (honest; I also asked Him to heal me of Gemco, and we all know what happened to Gemco) I haven't watched a soap in probably 30 years. But the point is, I know Erica and Vicki/Nicki are still there. And all's right with THAT part of the world.

But Nelly? She's about to leave me. Maybe another hour, and she'll be gone. I'm glad to have known this clever, interesting girl. I won't soon forget her.

I wonder what Luke Spencer is up to these days...

pie count: 9604

clbd: shedding on my new blue bedspread.

Nails! He's doing this with nails!

Check this out!

btw, pie count stands at 8613

clbd: on the rug staring at my Pick Up Stix leftovers.

7,052

Number of pies we've sold since the Fall Pie Sale began!

The best and the worst of blogging

The best is meeting new people by linking and linking and linking.

The worst is all the POO stories! I had forgotten how often and how creatively kids disseminate poop. I keep having to get up from the computer and go scrub under my nails!

The best is gleaning good ideas from other bloggers.

The worst is reading about someone's heartbreak, knowing they're so far away you can't physically help them.

The best is the descriptions --both verbal and photographic -- of the changing Fall weather in Maine or Minnesota.

The worst is the longing to go see, feel, touch those places, knowing you probably never will. (But I have decided I am going to go see a real pueblo before I die)

The best is the sense of community when someone responds to something you've written. Bloggers lend a hearty "Amen!" to our lives.

The worst is realizing you have spent more times with your friends' blogs than face to face!

The best is spending hours wandering through peoples' lives

The worst is spending hours wandering through peoples' lives. (what laundry?)

Was this meant to be a comedy?

...because I laughed my head off.

kewl monkey beans!

Teach Your Children Well...

I've begun making flash card sets for the 3 third grade classes at Mr Roboto's school. The teachers love them, and Mr Roboto thinks his Grammie is the coolest ever. Here's my process...


1. First I go to the Santa Maria-Bonita Unified School District web page (a treasure trove!) and get the list of vocab words based on each reading unit.


2. Sometimes I use their choices of images (eh) but usually I go to Google images to find really cool pictures that illustrate the word. This is the most fun, and most time-consuming part. It's like when you have to look something up in the encyclopedia, and you get immersed in reading interesting little-known facts that you have to share with anyone who will listen, and then you forget what you originally wanted to research. (btw, yes, I did sing The Encyclopedia song as I typed that word...twice)


3. I import it all to PowerPoint, make one slide per photo and one slide per definition. I also make a slide of the book cover and one of the author and illustrator. I print these out, 4 to a page, and trim them just outside the frame.


4. I choose a bright paper color, and cut backings for each word. Of course I am OCD-ish enough that I want the color to coordinate with the book jacket.


5. Next I put the definition on one side, and the photo on the other side, and run them thru the laminator. While I'm doing this, I'm getting a little taste of my dream job: playing with the machines at Kinkos


6. I trim them, then use a pair of nail clippers to nip away each sharp corner. (Did I mention being OCD-ish?) Punch a hole, add a split ring, and voila! A learning tool for the classroom.

Fun, pretty, utilitarian, and it satisfies my Kinkos itch.

smallville

I'd never watched this show until this summer when I joined Blockbusters and decided to check it out. Now I've watched discs 1&2 of season 1.

And I have a question:

HUH?

It appears everyone in this town is normal except for during the episode in which they are featured, at which time they suddenly turn into Frozone or Gurgling Belly Girl or Old/Young Pianist Killer. Is this what I am to expect from the remaining episodes?

Because if it is, I may just switch to computer solitaire.

Look at that sweet face...

...now picture it with a broken nose.

We've all heard fast food can be unhealthy, but today C-Monkey experienced a freak fast food related accident we never saw coming. Arby's has a hand rail apparatus designed to keep their innumerable customers (3) in a nice, tidy line. We've told C-Monkey a zillion times not to hang on the rails, but he knew -- and we knew -- we were only saying that so the manager wouldn't yell at him (or more importantly, at us, and then spit in our food...we restaurant people really do that, you know; just watch the channel 2 news)

Anyway, C was hanging or swinging or something when all four bolts let go at the same time, the faux marble hand rail flew off, clocked him on the forehead, bounced off his nose, and knocked him on his keister. That TWACK! sound was the back of his head hitting the tile floor. There was no blood, just a tiny scratch on his nose and a wail that would give the Civil Defense siren a run for it's money.

While we took turns holding him, rocking and soothing him, we watched the bridge of his nose begin to swell. phopl took him to the baby vet, and sure enough, he has a broken face. He went to his dad's for the weekend, but I fully expect to see him on Monday sporting a pair of shiners. So the moral of the story is: be oh-so-careful out there in those treacherous fast food restaurants.

And we thought the only danger was the cholesterol...

Bethany, you do NOT need a new computer...but it's stinkin' cute, isn't it?

Back where he belongs...

Welcome home, friend!

Searching for a melody

I wrote a song. It's about the seasons in a woman's life. I dreamed this thing, then woke up and wrote it down. Verses, bridges, choruses...a whole entire song! OK, that's not strictly accurate. I don't have any music for it, so I guess what I actually have here is a poem. Apparently, I am Rodgers but not Hammerstein; Lerner but not Loewe. Can you help me out here?

1. What to wear, can’t find a thing/frizzy hair, and static cling
Late for work, I think I lost my keys
Working lunches, business plans/memos, emails, traffic jams
Customers impossible to please

Starbucks coffee, micro chips/rubber bands and paper clips
Muzak is so loud I cannot think
Pay roll and computer screens/angry bosses, fax machines
The paper’s jammed, the printer’s out of ink

My life has spun out of control, I’ve fallen deep into a hole
I take a breath, and I remember what to do

I run to You, I run to You
My life’s pedantic, frantic ‘til I run to You
This day can’t get the best of You
No matter what I have to do
You hold my hand and walk me through
I run to You

2. Diaper pails and runny nose/sticky fingers, dress up clothes
Can’t remember if I made the bed
Peanut butter, Dr Seuss /Cheerios and apple juice
Sponge Bob’s theme is running through my head

Mommy, where’s my sippy cup/Mom, the toilet’s backing up
What’s for dinner? I don’t have a plan
Piles of laundry, never done/need to make a Target run
Wake up tired, do it all again

I like to think my race is won; I won’t admit to anyone
I’m going under, then remember what to do

I run to You, I run to You
I’m feeling harried, buried
Then I run to You
I leave the chaos and the noise
Of dirty faces, bikes and toys
You share my heartaches and my joys
I run to You


3. The house is quiet, so’s my head/there’s time to read, and make the bed
The laundry and the dishes all are done
The kids have grown and left the nest/They say this time of life is best
They say it’s time to care for Number One

But I miss my mom and miss my dad/I miss my kids, the times we had
And my heart aches for those who’ve come and gone
Love my grandkids, love my friends/love the times I have with them
Why then, do I feel so all alone?

I know You love me desperately; I know You have a plan for me
And once again I am reminded what to do

I run to You; I run to You
When life feels shattered, tattered
I can run to You
No matter what I face today
You’re there to lead me all the way
If I will only stop and pray
And run to You

I know You love me desperately;
I know You have a plan for me
Lord, here's my life, and willingly
I run to You

No Mas!

Yippee!

Is this modern classroom management?

I could use some insight from the teacher-y crew. I've worked in C-Monkey's kinder class twice, and this has been the case both times.

There is a little guy in the class we'll call Dustin. During the time of day where the kids are all working on projects at the various tables, he is up and about with the rest of the class. But during rug time, he is all alone, at a table clear across the room, and is even facing the opposite wall. The rug is on the other side of the room, behind a room divider, and the teacher sits with her back to the divider. There is no way Dustin can even see the rug, much less see (or hear!) the teacher, because he's about 15 feet away, and facing the opposite direction. This is the time she's reading books, teaching letter sounds, etc.

My heart is breaking for Dustin. He's not nearly the naughtiest boy in the class. He's a typical squirrely little 5-year-old boy whose teacher has isolated him to the point of his not being included in her teaching time. I don't know why this is happening, and I don't know if it's my place to ask her about someone else's kid's behavior issues. But my heart breaks for Dustin, and I need some advice...

If you had read an old post about trying to transfer the ownership of our truck, the California DMV was thrilled with the latest Lien Release, but now they want something else, a transfer of ownership form...actually it's another transfer of ownership form. Anyway, I signed it, filled it out as best I could, and gave it back to the buyer.

We shall see...

Want to guess where I dined today?

C-Monkey's Word-a-pillar Wall

"red" A very useful word.

Stay tuned.

Seen on my way to work...

I have a neurotic fear of driving behind one of these trucks when suddenly -- ping! -- the tiny little Barbie doll sized chains snap, and the entire load comes rolling down into my personal driving space. Hay trucks? Those flatbeds carrying a 47 foot-high stack of pallets? Logging trucks? Those monstrous trucks carrying sheep? My palms are sweating just writing about it!

You know the Bible has 365 "fear nots", one for each day of the year. If you come across the one that covers this particular fear, let me know. I'll be right over here, curled up in the fetal position, weeping quietly.

Tagged by my kid!

Use three words only...no more, no less.

Where is your cell phone? never far away
Where is one of your parents? both in heaven
Cheesecake? Marie Callender's best
Your favorite thing to do? play with TheGuys
Your dream last night? something about Cameron...?
Your favorite drink? brewed iced tea
The room you're in? comfy family room
George Bush? God bless him
What you're good at? World's best grammie
One of your wish list items? maybe Sirius radio
Where did you grow up? Lovely little Riverside
The last thing you did? emptied the dishwasher
What are you wearing? nice loose pants
Who stole your sunglasses? They're probably lost
Ketchup? on the side
Your computer? Dude, a Dell
Your life? Full and fun
Your mood? always Suzie Sunshine
Your next blog? probably later tonight
Your car is? Honda Pilot...yippee!
Your summer? joyous and sad
Your favorite color? Red; no, green
When is the last time you laughed? not for minutes

My Dirty Little Geekret: Boy Bands